LEWIS & CLARK ENTERTAIN THE LOCALS

During The Era Of Biden’s Demolition, There Is Still Room For Laughs

Americans wonder what will become of us by the end of Biden’s four years of America-Last policies.  We are now more in need of laughs than any other period within my lifetime.  Also, several weeks ago I promised by readers that I would re-publish some of the history articles I wrote for local newspapers last year.  Here is an amusing event during Lewis & Clark’s trek westward.

On the Mighty Columbia River, Celilo Falls* was the first of three extremely treacherous rapids that the Lewis & Clark Expedition had to traverse on their way to the Pacific Ocean.  They passed through Celilo Falls without much ordeal.  The next rapids were named the Short Narrows by a terrified Captain Clark.  On October 23, 1805 he wrote in his journal: “the horrid appearance of this agitated gut swelling, boiling & whorling in every direction.”

By the standards of today, this was a Class V rapid, meaning it could not be run in a modern canoe specially designed for whitewater.  The local Indians, expert canoeists themselves, did not believe these peculiar strangers could do it in their big, heavy dugouts.

Indians gathered along the high banks overlooking the river to watch these crazy men (and Sacagawea) drown themselves, and to be ready to help themselves to the abandoned equipment & supplies afterwards.  They were astonished that the Americans finished the run without incident.

But the Indians were certain they couldn’t make it through the final river obstacle, named the Long Narrows.  So, again they gathered on the banks to await the inevitable disaster.  They left disappointed.  The Corps of Discovery finished their overland trek when Captain William Clark first spied the Pacific Ocean on November 18, 1805.**  They had accomplished their mission of linking the Pacific Ocean with the Atlantic Ocean!

*Many older Oregonians and Washingtonians remember Celilo Falls.  Two hundred miles upstream from the mouth of the mighty Columbia River which now divides the State of Washington and the State of Oregon, construction of The Dalles Dam in 1957 submerged this powerful force of nature.  The meaning of “The Dalles” is: a river confined between walls or a canyon or gorge.

**While most of the crew remained upriver, Clark took 11 men about five miles further west to be the first Americans to cast their eyes on the Pacific Ocean.  This historic event took place on the present-day Long Beach Peninsula, WA, just a short bike ride from the beach house this writer has enjoyed for 27 years.